People let things burden them. We let the things in our past
control our actions in the future. Is it revenge, or is it inevitable? If we
allow something like hurt feelings to control our lives then there would be a
world of hate. It’s cliché to say forgive and forget, so I won’t. I don’t believe
in that. I believe you should forgive and move on.
To forget something,
is to forget who you are. Moments, which I learned very recently, are
important, they shape you into the person you are today. The way you feel, or have to live makes you
the person you are. Maybe you've had a hard live, both parents unemployed, you,
as a child, work 35-40 hours a week. You skip meals to make sure your sibling
eat. You deal with emotional abuse from you father. This all makes you who you
are. How?
Certain obstacles in life make you stronger. They make you
obligated to face every situation good or bad, head on with a smile. It makes
you realize, the little things in life are important.
In my case, my dad and I never had a great relationship.
Have you watched those movies where people hold grudges and then the person
dies? The person who held the grudge is left feeling sad and empty and going on
and on about how the last thing they said to that person was I hate you. Well I
refuse to feel that way.
Not too long ago I got the news that my dad was dying. After
hearing this news, I cried and cried, and had no clue why. How could I cry for
a man who had all the characteristics of a stranger? How could I care about a
man who threatened me so many times, a man who told my mom he loved my brother
more? Well here’s why.
Without him I wouldn't be alive. When he dies, I don’t want
to remember telling him I hate him. Previously I stated that some situations
shape people into the person they are today. That included my dad. Not knowing
him also means I don’t know his childhood, or his past. There could be things
that made him bitter. Even more, I don’t want to be sad anymore. I don’t want
to wonder how my own blood doesn't give a damn about me. I don’t want to feel
unloved and lonely anymore. I want to be happy.
So, what I’m asking, forgive and move on. Don’t allow your
past to control your happiness. If you want to be happy you have to let go of
all the anger. All the built up animosity you have inside, you need to let it
out. Holding on to a burden does nothing but pull you down; it brings you down
into this deep depression. Look at the root of all your hurt and anger, and let
it go. Free yourself into this new world of happiness.
I’ll look my dad in the eyes, and let him know, I forgive
you, and I love you.
This post in particular spoke to me because I have a hard time FORGIVING. I'm really working on not holding grudges. I also have "daddy issues" and I still to this day let it affect my life. I absolutely agree with the fact that you shouldn't forget, but you should forgive and move on. I learned from this post that if you don't forgive who hurt you, they hold the power.
ReplyDeleteI honestly can also relate this blog based on the dad issues. He doesn't have the best past with my family and many have concluded to just forget about it and don't forgive just forget completely. I stand by your viewpoint of having the last comment you say to somebody be a bad one, so I just don't bother with judging or pay attention to his actions and just overall love so you can be happy, like stated above.
ReplyDeleteI agree, people say its easier just to leave on a bad note but its not necessarily the best thing to do. Forgiving makes things easier on yourself. No matter what the person did you cant fully hate them. Not even because they helped you be here but subconsciously there's no way you can truly not love a parent.
ReplyDelete